You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Randomize
