That's when you crack a 10am beer
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
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