i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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