So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
pop tarts are not kleenex
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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