everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
