Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
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