Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
