I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize