So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
