Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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