If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
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