My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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