True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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