i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Randomize
