this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch