um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
