Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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