Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
