Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize