Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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