I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
