i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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