I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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