come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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