You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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