Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
