So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
You dont lie about slip and slides
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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