i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
foreskin is a definite game changer
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Randomize