so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
