fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
