she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
