Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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