Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
