I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize