the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Naked. naked and bneed help.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
