Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize