I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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