That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
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