what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
