You work out of a Hotel?
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize