i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
