i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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