none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
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