we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
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