So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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