party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?