he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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