What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
