I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Best friends brother. Beat that.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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