I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
