he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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