Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
